Thursday, 22 June 2017

Flashing knickers!! 😖

So I probably experienced one of the most embarrassing, mortifying and traumatic moments of my life yesterday. I still shudder just thinking about it!!

I finished work and collected Faye, had tea, did some work whilst Faye got ready for gym. All fine. Took her to gym and sorted out Billy going for a trial next week (bless him!). Decided not to bother going home so just say in the car, rang mum and dad and spoke to Billy. Still all good so far.  Got out of the car to go a different fetch Faye, and my nightmare began.

It was still warm and I was happily walking past the cars to the gym when I lady following me down the hill called 'excuse me'. I turned and realised she was calling to me so stopped. Her next words sent a chill right through me.

'Sorry, but I thought I should tell you your dress is split all down the back.'

'Is it bad?`

`Well it's all the way down you the hem. You can see your pants and everything. I thought it was shorts to start with but then realised. I'm really sorry but if it says me I'd want someone to tell me...'

I was mortified!!!  I had no coat. Nothing. And I just stood there like an idiot with no idea what to do!! Then there was the horror of wondering how long it had been split without me noticing? Surely someone at work would have said. Wouldn't they?? Or at school when I picked Faye up? And what about when I dropped Faye off at gym and spent a while at reception with kids and parents everywhere?? Had I been flashing my knickers to all and sundry?! They weren't even a decent pair!! The thought was paralysing!!

I held the back of my dress together the best I could, probably looking like I'd had an accident as I scuttled into the waiting room clutching my bum and clamped myself to the nearest wall! Faye was first out which, to start with I thought was good, as that meant I could get away quick. In reality I soon realised that just meant that everyone else was behind me......

'Faye walk behind me!'

'why?'

'just do it?!'

'why?'

I told her about my predicament and she promptly went into hysterics! Not that I could blame her, no doubt I'd have done the same. She did walk behind me though. Encouraging me as we went. Not.

'Mum you look weird, just let go of it'

'I can't. You can see my knickers'

'it'll be better than you look now'

'Thanks. But it really wouldn't. And stop laughing!'

'I can't, it's funny'

At this point I noticed a car with one of the dad's I know say in it. We always say hello, but on this occasion I thought it would be better to focus ahead and pretend I hadn't noticed him.

'It is NOT funny. At all'

I'm sure there was an amused look on 'dad's' face as I passed the car.....

'let go'

'no'

'well you're going to have to let go of it in a minute to get in the car!'

'yes. Thank you. I'm well aware of that!'

Thankfully the car next to me dad empty so I was able to take refund between the two cars.

'let's have a look then'

I let go.

'[gasp] oh m that is really bad! I mean REALLY bad!!`

I have never been so pleased and relieved to get in my car!!

And I've never known 10 minutes to be do traumatic it felt like 10 hours!!!

At least Faye reassured me that my dress was fine when I dropped her off so that was at least some relief!

All I need to do now is find the receipt...... and a disguise to wear to all future trips to gym........... 😐

Wednesday, 21 June 2017

Iiiiiiiiiiit's RANT TIME!!!!!

OK, so maybe I'm just not in the best of moods today. Or maybe, just maybe, it's been a day full of idiots conspiring to annoy me............ On the bright side, they only partially succeeded 
It started with a kamikaze cyclist  on the school run. Now I know cyclists have just as much right to be on the road as cars, and I am generally very considerate of them,  but surely they should comply with the rules of the road too?? So if their traffic lights are on red, STOP! Don't just carry on and cycle straight across in front of me, when my lights are on green, and just expect me to stop! I did, but one day you might not be so lucky......
I then had a stereotypical white van man cut me up, twice, coz he was in so much of a hurry as he obviously felt he was much more important than everyone else trying to get to work. Still it worked out well for him, he managed to get 1 vehicle ahead of where he started (behind me) all the way in to town, shaving milliseconds off his time,  so Woohoo!! Well done Mr Van driver! You must be sooooo proud of your achievement!! 
So that was all before I actually got in to work.......
As far as work goes, there are a few things I consider important...
1. Work hard and you will be rewarded (OK maybe that one is a bit out of date and optimistic.....)
2. Be humble and don't run ramshod over other people to get where you want /get the recognition you want, whether you deserve it or not.
3. Don't ask anyone to do anything you aren't prepared to do yourself
4. If something needs doing and there's no one else available, do it yourself!
..... But maybe I'm just old skool
Why people can't do something that, OK, might not be their job, but would only take them approximately 1 minute at the most to do is beyond me. Especially when not doing it can causes delays of a day or so. I guess some people must think certain tasks are beneath them......
Still, however irritating, it's not such a biggy I guess and I can at least be glad that I'm not like that.
I had half a day's annual leave to take Billy for another visit to big school, this time we left them and they went on their own. He was full of it when he came back and loved it! I was so pleased and feel happier that he isn't going to be really clingy when he starts  We got Faye and came home to get changed and go straight into the paddling pool. It was soooo nice! We had a pack of water balloons and had an hour or so messing about in the pool and staying cool! . We had a great time and all was well with the world again!
For a bit ....
Tonight I dropped Faye off at guides and went swimming.  It was a busy but lovely and cool. There were a few lads being lads but there were also the annoying chatters. I know people go with their friends and have a bit of a natter, I know I used to. But we swim in lanes and I still have to stop every two lengths to, well, breathe! It's therefore pretty annoying to not be able to stop at the end coz of people chatting. I don't mean a few minutes chit chat while they have a breather, I'm talking 10/15 minutes of not moving! In the 10 lengths or so I managed whilst they were chatting, I learnt more about their dog's habits, behaviour in the park, what they had for dinner blah blah blah than I really needed, or wanted, to know! Then one of them complained about how busy it was and that they hadn't even got out of breath yet! I was so close to pointing out that that wasn't exactly surprising seeing as they hadn't moved for ages, although the amount of yapping she was doing should have rendered her breathless!  Unfortunately this didn't happen and I had to suffer overhearing their inane conversations......
Hopefully, seeing as it was far too busy for them, they won't be there when I go again. It would be much safer for them, probably more than they could ever imagine.....!!

Friday, 16 June 2017

Wet chairs and water fights 💦

Well it's been a funny old week! This time last week I was sat at home after a long day at the polling station watching the first of the results come in. It seems much longer than a week ago!

It was lovely to get out in the garden and get some planting done after all the rain last week and I'm happy to say my cucamelon plants are looking good! I can't wait for them to grow and fruit..... They are going to be soooo cute!!

Work has been a bit stressful to the point where I'm not sure if I even speak English or people can't actually hear me.... But then something will happen that makes turning up worthwhile.....

For instance, as I got into work on Tuesday I found boxes of files on my desk that needed to go to the lab. I grabbed a couple of boxes and was on my way when a colleague came out of a nearby office and called me in, saying I needed to look at her chair because she didn't know what to do. She explained someone had been in her office, sitting in her chair, and her chair was now marked.... Sure enough I looked at the chair and there was, what I can only describe as, a wet, oddly shaped streak on the seat. I shared her horror with an exclamation of "what is that?!". She replied that she didn't know, we really didn't want to know, but she didn't know what to do because she couldn't bring herself to sit on it. I didn't blame her but at that point I started laughing uncontrollably until I was crying!  Just thinking about it again now whilst I'm writing this is making me giggle! When I'd calmed down enough to be able to speak, I reasoned that we must have something in the department or lab to clean/disinfect it with, and we had a spare chair in our office she could use.  We did find some Flash (with Febreze I might add!) in the tea room, so I gave it a good scrub and left it to dry....... All's well that ends well 😂

Yesterday was sunny and hot, promoting one of the managers to bring a lead of jubbleys into work. And a number of water pistols. What could go wrong?! Well, maybe giving one to me for a start! It was nice to temporarily revert to being a kid again though!!

Last night Faye was in an interschool athletics competition involving all the local schools, about a dozen altogether. As you can imagine, it was organised chaos but I think the teachers and everyone involved did a really good job sorting so many kids out! I didn't any even one bit! Everyone did well and seemed to enjoy it anyway.

Today the water pistols are forgotten about. For most of the day. Then all hell let loose in the office! In hindsight I should have known better than to shoot one of the Consultants. At the time I didn't know better but son learnt my lesson when he came back at me with a fairly powerful water bottle. I got soaked. As did the carpet, my chair, my desk....... Squirt two had me running out of the office to escape another drenching. And to dry out!

Things calmed down, he left for home and I went to collect my printing. On returning to the office I walked through the door and got soaked again.... and almost had a heart attack as he was hiding behind the wall as I came in! Apparently he'd forgotten his phone and thought it to perfect an opportunity to miss! I can't say I blame him, I would most likely have done the same thing myself. I did get him back with the water bottle on his way out though 😂

Best of all, it's nearly the weekend again!! It's meant to be a lovely one too! I can see paddling pools, hose pipes and water bombs on the horizon........

So a Happy Father's Day to all of you Dad's out there and I hope you all get spoiled!! Xxx

Tuesday, 6 June 2017

Schools and pools

Today Billy had his first induction at 'Big School' ready for starting in September. For all my concerns about him being less confident and more clingy than Faye was, after a couple of minutes his coat was off and he was getting stuck in!! A couple of kids he knew from pre-school last year are there too and they came over to him which was sweet of them. We made pictures with shells, played in the kitchen, did a puppet show, and went climbing in planks, crates and tyres outside in the rain! He seemed to really enjoy it and asked when he could go back so it looks promising!

Faye's been to athletics after school fir the last two nights and has really enjoyed it. Her teacher has told us she's very good and the best at throwing! She throws Billy around a lot so I guess she has had a fair amount of practice! 😂

After dropping Faye off at guides I made it back to the swimming pool again. Aren't I a good girl!! It was a lot busier to start with but then emptied a bit and, apart from a couple of lads being a couple of lads, it was fairly peaceful and relaxing. Unfortunately, my muscles must have been tired from the effort last night as I only managed half a mile in 45 minutes. Still, better than nothing I suppose. I'll aim at just making it into the pool tomorrow night!!!

Monday, 5 June 2017

...and I'm done. In. Completely...😩

At least I did it.  After a fairly long break from the pool I was quietly optimistic of managing my 1k/40 length goal.

But, get me, I'd done that in just under 50 minutes so then faced the dilemma of getting out whilst the going was good and I'd done what I wanted to.......or seeing if I could get another 8 lengths in the last 10 minutes to make it 3/4 of a mile in an hour.

I only went and did it!

Admittedly I am now completely cream crackered and ache everywhere!  But I don't care!  Smug me is back! 😏

Now to see if I can keep it up long enough to make it back there again on Wednesday..........

Fitness regime attempt No. 6875423885.........

So here we go again...... another attempt at regular swimming sessions. I have made it as far as the gym..... in the rain no less! To be fair, getting wet to get to the gym isn't really anything to be pleased with myself for when my goal is the pool!
Unbelievably, my swipe card worked to let me in - I was expecting alarms to go off, lights to flash and a booming voice to yell "Who the hell are you?! Don't you come swanning back here after all this time and expect to just be let straight back in!!!"
Thankfully, that was just the paranoia in my head!
So here I am, ready to go for it. Again. I'll be back with an update. Presuming the shock of exercise doesn't kill me...... 

Tuesday, 30 May 2017

Rain, rain go away, come again.... Actually, you know what? Don't bother!

So a typical bank holiday/packing up camp day with rain. And more rain. Lots of rain........

After breakfast we started to get things packed away as much as we could in the dry but as all that got done we were forced to empty the tent and load it all, and the kids into the car and start loading the trailer..

At one point we were also forced to the car by the monsoon type rain, waiting for it to slow enough for us to carry on. In the end we just had to go for it. We were drenched within minutes but it seems you can actually only get so wet....

Our jeans were so wet we were close, on several occasions, of sporting the current half way down your bum look...... Not a pleasant thought!

We finally managed to get everything packed and loaded, all as wet as we were! We need some sun when we get home to dry everything out !

It was our first experience of a CCC rally and we loved it. We were at Merry Weather Farm and the rally was organised by the Coventry DA. The stewards were really friendly and helpful as were all the other campers/caravanners there. We really enjoyed it and I'm sure we will be on another rally soon!

Sunday, 28 May 2017

Rollright stones and Cotswold Farm Park

What better to do on a sunny, cloudy, and rainy day than to go and look at a stone circle. I mean, everyone loves a stone circle don't they? No? Just me? Oh well, never mind. I like it so off we went to the Rollright stones!

It was a bit chilly and very windy but the lady, when we got there, chatted and told us some of the history of the stones. She was a volunteer with the Rollright Trust and bless her for turning out in such conditions! We learnt all about the Whispering Knights, the King's Men and the King Stone. There had been a druid wedding in the morning and one of the trees had ribbons and purses tied in it.  It is said that if you count the stones in the circle twice and get the same number both times your wish will be granted. All I can say is, we tried! Several times. Nice of us got the same number twice or even the same number as each other! I guess those wishes are just going to have to wait!

The following day forecast a dry sunny day so we booked tickets for Adam Henson's Cotswold Farm Park. It was really good! Faye and Billy tried their hands at milking fake cows, we had a tractor and trailer ride around the sight learning about the rare breeds, then went to the barn where the kids could hold chicks, which were very sweet. However, they weren't as cute as the ducklings, which were adorable! Forget the kids, I wanted a duckling so asked and, like the kids, I was told to sit down and was handed a duckling...... My duckling was the cutest thing ever with his (or hers) big clumsy webbed feet, although it was a lively little thing! I really didn't want to hand it back told Jay I wanted a duck for our 'pond'. Unsurprisingly he rolled his eyes and said "she's worse than the kids.."  I'm guessing no duck then 🙁

We went round and fed the animals before going back to queue to feed the lambs and kids (OK, yes, me again....) . After half an hour we were duly given a bottle each to feed whichever animal fought, pushed and nuzzled it's way to the teet first, which was empty in about 2 seconds flat!

After that we went on the wildlife walk, saw the beehive (I was slightly more cautious and observant in this area due to my apparent allergy!), climbed over some logs and made our way to the play area. The whole day was really enjoyable and I would recommend it to anyone looking for a day out in the area, with or with hour kids! It was well run, well organised and the staff were all really pleasant, helpful and genuinely seemed to enjoy what they were doing. We had ice creams and visited the shop before making our way back to camp.

Faye's new friend was at the rent door almost before we got through it! We had a BBQ then new friend's grandparents brought their chairs and drink up, the neighbours joined us and we watched the kids' show as the sun set behind the trees.....

A very enjoyable and relaxing weekend!

Saturday, 27 May 2017

Cotswolds, camping and curfews...

It was such a gorgeous day to start our camping weekend, if a bit hot for travelling. Considering it was bank holiday Friday, we had a really good journey and reached the campsite by 6.30.  The weather was perfect for getting set up and because it was so nice, we had no idea of the time. Until I went off in search of a chippy.

Chipping Norton is only a couple of miles from the campsite and is bigger than I thought it would be. I parked up and had a walk around, found lots of pubs and bars (and yes I was tempted but thought I should maybe feed the kids first!), but no chippy and all the takeaways were shut. P Went back to the car and tried good old Google. 2 minutes later I was outside the chippy. Which we shut. Probably because it was 10.45! Plan B, I'd passed a garage. So it was meal deals all round!

Got back to the campsite and the was shut. But if a nuisance but no biggy. Got out to unlatch it, but no. It wasn't just shut, it was padlocked! I then saw the sign stating the gate closed at 11pm. It was 11.04. Aaarrgggghhhhh!! We still had stuff in the car, like our clothes, the cool box and another bag with some drink and food bits in...... A slightly panicked phone call to Jay and he met me with the kids to get the clothes and 'dinner'. Then went back for the wine (priorities!). So no chips, locked out and car dumped. Not a bad start...........

Wednesday, 24 May 2017

Red sky at night, Shepherd's delight...

.... and although there aren't many Shepherd's around here, plus I'm not that keen on lamb, I have enjoyed the sun making an appearance as the saying promises!

It first came out on Saturday morning and Faye was happy as she had a hot tub party in the afternoon. We went to Asda in the sunshine (no coats needed today!) and came out to black skies and a monsoon-like downpour! By the time we got back to the car we were soaked!! It kept alternating between sunshine and torrential rain for the rest of the day.

Faye and Billy had been wanting to watch Star Wars so on Friday night, as a treat, they were allowed the sofa bed out downstairs with me and we watched A New Hope (no arguments from me!). Billy made it as far as the Cantina band scene before flaking out but Faye watched the whole thing and loved it! :) Saturday night turned into another Star Wars night with the Empire Strikes Back and Return of the Jedi. Billy missed it again but Faye enjoyed them, apart from when Han and Leia kissed, which she watched in horror, pulled a face and said "eeeeewwww that's disgusting!!" 😂

Sunday was so nice we spent the day in the garden, mainly weeding but at least we were outside enjoying the sunshine. The trampoline is back up so the kids were happy too!  Most importantly, I finally got all the washing done and dried (oh how you must all envy the rock 'n' roll lifestyle I lead! 😂)

We also sorted out camping for the bank holiday weekend - we're off to Chipping Norton! Sounds a bit posh for us but never mind! The rollright stones are nearby and I do love a good stone circle! I just hope the weather stays like these. The memories of packing up in torrential lane at the end of our last camping holiday are still lurking in the back of my mind and not something I'm in a hurry to repeat!

So after a lovely day I got the kids in the bath whole Jay cooked dinner..... and that's when if hit...... I'd either done too much gardening or had too much sun as I suddenly felt rubbish! Nothing specific just generally crap! So once I'd got the kids settled, Iwent to bed myself!

I was fine in the morning and, after taking one look in the mirror, decided it was definitely the sun that made me bad. Glowing is an underestimate.... Warning beacon is closer, I was red. Very red. Some might say 'blazing' red (you know who you are!!) and ever so slightly sore!

Work has been work..... Enough said! Although after a pretty rubbish morning, someone dropped by the office for a chat to tell me it makes their day to see me when he goes by the office and it's never the same when I'm not there! Awwww how sweet! I do think he maybe got the wrong office........

Faye decided it was too hot to go gym tonight, until I gave her the alternative of helping me tidy - she soon changed her mind!! 😂 As it happens, she really hurt her hands on the bars with deep broken blisters, so she would have been better off tidying!!

The most exciting thing was getting home to a big box in the porch with our new portable toilet (basically a posh bucket with a seat) and toilet tent. Woohoo!! My sister did suggest I could lock myself in and hide when the kids are driving me nuts...... I should probably take some wine in with me too.....

Only one more day to get through..........

Sunday, 14 May 2017

Ging Gang Goolie Goolie Goolie Goolie wat...cha step Mrs!!

This weekend was a big weekend for Faye - her first time camping with the guides! I was probably more nervous about it than she was!! After spending Thursday night naming everything and cramming it into her rucksack she was ready. It turns out the rucksack was almost as big as her, How she managed to carry it I'll never know!
I was probably a bit older than her when I first went camping, but similar weekends working up to Charnwood 85. Did anyone reading this go there? There were loads of different activities but I remember archery was very popular with the guides. Which I am pretty sure, in fact certain, had absolutely nothing whatsoever at all to do with the rather gorgeous scout doing it!
As it happens, and possibly for the better, I wasnt able to take her as I had a prior engagement after work. At The Parcelyard. I did ring her though and she was very excited!
Whilst sitting in the Parcelyard waiting for a couple more work friends to arrive we heard a noise behind us and turned to see a woman on the floor, having fallen on the stairs, her, we assumed boyfriend, coming back down the stairs to her. We all did the very British thing of 'don't look at the drunk lady' and pretended nothing had happened. Until one of our group said "Hey isn't that our lady from work?". On re-checking, it turned out it wasn't a drunk lady falling over, leaving with her boyfriend, but was in fact our sober friend falling down the stairs on her way to meet us, helped by a gentleman who had been leaving whilst we all ignored her!! But fair play to her, what an entrance!!  I blame it on the fact that she hadn't got her pram with her to use for balance.  At this point, I would like to point out (particularly if my friend is reading this!), that most of my amusement at this situation was purely due to the fact that that is exactly the sort of thing that usually happens to me!
It was the usual chores Saturday, food shopping etc., but went shopping with Amez in the afternoon which was nice. The weekend was slightly strange though without Faye. And quiet! Especially Eurovision Saturday night which Faye loves. Billy had his flags to wave though and stayed awake for a lot of it.
Faye came back this afternoon and seemed to have enjoyed herself! Within a short space of time, her and Billy were arguing and falling out. 
I couldn't help a little happy smile to myself...... Yep, Faye’s home, normality has resumed and life is back to normal 

Wednesday, 10 May 2017

The Good Old Days

After a friend from primary school asked if I had any photos of us, I popped round to mum and dad's to pick something up..... And a couple of hours later was still looking through photo albums!!

Some photos had people in that I couldn't even remember and yet others brought back memories of people I hadn't thought about in years. Some of them for good reason!! 😂

Thankfully some other friends were able to help out where my memory failed, and vice versa!

Our school performance of 'Hip Hip Horatio' (about the life of Horatio Nelson in case you were wondering) was a far cry from the fairytales the top class usually put on, and I do remember being really peeved about that at the time! There were more people in my class than I remembered and as all the boys appeared to have beards for the production, my ability to recognise any of them was pretty much zero! I only recognised the one that all the girls liked as I recall!!

My old school photo was also spookily similar to Faye's, although I think she was probably more disturbed by that than me! 😂

And who can forget that luuuurvely Brownie uniform, complete with woolly hat?!

Times moved on to Cala Gran in Fleetwood where I spent a happy 8 months as a barmaid with my sister and temporary illusionist's assistant after we jacked in our jobs at the Alliance and Leicester, much to the shock of my manager at the time!! We had many 'theme' nights which had me dressed up as Hilda Ogden, a flapper girl, St. Trinians, a French maid, a clown amongst many...... I was so (rather cruelly I thought) 'advertised' as a 'cheap night out - one bottle of Max and she's anybody' 's!' To clarify, it would have taken at least two bottles. And food. 😊 Max, for anyone who doesn't know, was a strong bottled cider, the Northern version of Diamond White. I never really used to drink much prior to Fleetwood as I had generally been the designated driver so it is true that after one bottle of Max I was likely to be asleep...... It was good fun though, even when we did have to thaw caravan pipes out with a hairdryer in the winter just to be able to make a cuppa!! We made friends for life during that short stint and my life is all the richer for it.

It's so nice to be able to look back and relive old memories, remember people you thought you'd forgotten and wonder where their lives have taken them...

"It's not like the good old days" always seemed a bit of a cliché, but it's true. Or maybe I'm just getting old! Either way, we had lots of fun and I'm grateful for those friends and experiences.

Good times!!

Friday, 5 May 2017

Election Day - Round 1

So everything started well.

I'd spent Wednesday night baking goodies to see us through the long day ahead, got everything ready, even did my nails! I'd never been so organised! My plan was to get up at 5am, pack my bag, go to Asda to pick up a couple of bits for Faye's imminent camping trip, get diesel and be at the polling station for 6.15/6.30. That was the plan. I set my alarm and snuggled down for a decent hours' sleep.

As the saying goes, the best laid plans.......

I woke up at 4.20, great still half an hour until I have to get up 😊 then I heard Jay get up.... Strange for him to be up do early....

I looked at the clock, then double checked, blinking back at my was the worst start to my day...... 6.05.....

NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! 😕😕😕

My polling station is a good 20 to 30 minute drive away and I was meant to be there for 6.30, ready to open the doors to voters at 7am. Jay got everything ready for me as I got ready and I was out if the door at 6.20. I tried ringing the Presiding Officer, 4 times, without success. Considering I'm normally early and the first there, it was reassuring that it got to 6.40, as I was pulling in to the car park, before he rang back. I could have been in a ditch somewhere! 😂

Once there I calmed down and the day went fairly smoothly. I got asked if I was married which, if it had come from some gorgeous hunk of a man, would have been flattering. Unfortunately the gentleman was in his 70's/80's and didn't even appear to know which election he was there for........ So not exactly flattered!!

Still out team had a good day, it was a nice change and actually quite relaxing spending the day just having to write down numbers, hand out ballot papers, eat and read! I did manage to read an entire book through the day/night!

We were out by 10.20 pm and made our way back to Harborough for the verification count. At which point my diesel light started flashing.........

Verification went well and by 1.30 am we were done. After several conversations to locate the nearest 24 hour petrol station (slightly concerned about this as I was pretty sure I wouldn't make it home!), someone came along and confirmed the one on my way home WAS 24 hours. It was. Feeling more than a little relieved, I filled the tank and got home around 2am.

By that time I was wide awake so took ages to get to sleep, then up got ready, briefly saw Jay and the kids before coming back for the count!

All went well, no recounts and results declared. Went for a break at 1 and dismissed at 1.30! Now home for a rest!! Well, play with the kids at least!!

That's it for 5 weeks until we're back for Round 2 - the General Election.  I gave a feeling that one may take longer......... 😂